The Zielke Hut

We proudly announce Baby Boy #THREE, or “Peanut Wilkie Zielke”

With his thumb like Elliott!

His sweet little profile

Whenever I pictured my life in the future, for some reason I always assumed I’d have lots of sons and at least one daughter.  :)  I consider myself pretty girly, and coming from a house of all sisters I really only knew all things girl!  I had always hoped for boys since I never had  a brother, but I guess in the back of my mind I just thought I’d of course have a girl, too.

After having Trevor and Elliott, I still thought I’d have more children.  Oddly though, with this pregnancy I’ve felt a real sense of closure the entire time that I haven’t experienced before.  I feel like our family is complete- which I know can only be God because I always told people I’d have hundreds of babies! :)

So when that ultrasound technician said, “It’s a boy!”  It kind of came as a shock to my soul.

Not because I was sad I was having a son- I love him more than my life already- but because it hit me that I’m not going to have a daughter.

That night was a very hard night for me.  And I’m hesitant to share this with you- I feel very vulnerable-because I don’t want it to be misinterpreted.  I love Trevor, Elliott, and Peanut Wilkie Zielke and would not trade them for anything.  I’m trying to make peace with the fact that God’s plan for my life is MUCH different than my plan for my life.   I know that being a mom of three sons is His best for me, and where would I want to be than other in the center of His will???   The emotional process of all this realization is what has been difficult for me.

Since we found out, I have prayed two things very consistently.  1) That God would help me to trust Him and His plan for my family and 2) That God would fill the void that only He can fill  in my heart that longs for a daughter.

God has done SO much in me even in these few short days.  He has used so many people to encourage me, whether it be people closest to me, strangers in passing, or my own sons!  I’ve felt the embrace of my heavenly Father in a mighty way, and I know He is saying, “Jenni, seriously….would I do anything less than my best?!”  Here are some of His sweet kisses:

-my dear friend Erika wrote, “a boy! i have always thought that raising a man of God, a head of a family, is such an amazing responsibility. God must think so much of you as a mother to give you three fathers/husbands/men to raise! and i mean that! :) i know you would have loved some pink and ruffles in your house, but truly jenni, i think it is an honor to be given 3 sons!”

-my close friend Sarah reminded me of our mutual family friends, The Frees.  Lauren Free married Mark, who is from a family of four boys!  Sarah does Lauren’s mom’s hair and she shared with me how MaryAnn always raves about her in-laws.  Mark and his brothers are incredibly respectful, Godly men, who adore their mom. :)  AND she now has a fantastic daughter in law in Lauren!  I seriously felt my heart leap for joy when Sarah told me all this- I honestly then had a new future “picture” in my head- it was me, incredibly proud of all my grown boys.

-Sarah (again…what would I do without her?) took me out to dinner one night and told me that we are going to make a pact and start our own special memories and traditions as best friends in place of what we’d do with our daughters.  So we will go shopping, have lunch dates, and get pedicures all the way to age 90 and beyond. :)

-since we’ve found out I’ve seen SO many families with all boys.  (Ironic, right? :) )  I asked one mom today how it has been having boys, and she just went on and on about how great it has been.  She’s loved it!  And she’s girly too! :)  She came from a house full of girls to having a her own house full of boys, just like me!

-and finally, the sweetest thing God could have done for me happened last night.  I was sitting at the kitchen table and Trevor was walking toward me, talking.  At that moment, I felt little Peanut Wilkie Zielke wiggle inside of me.  I said, “Trevor, Peanut Wilkie Zielke is kicking- he likes your voice!”  And Trevor yelled into the living room, “Elliott come here!  Our brother is kicking!”  Leave it to God to use my young son to enlarge my heart and flood it with His love.  At that moment, I fully embraced the new and improved picture of my life.  My three sons.  Whom I love more than my life itself. I am your mom.

So if someone else says anything to me to the gist of, “Ohhh, I’m sorry.  If it was a girl you’d have the perfect family!”  you WILL feel your face sliced apart as my mother bear claws come ripping down on it.  I am delighted, honored, proud, and blessed to have these three boys as the children God has chosen for me.

“For you are a people holy to the LORD your God. The LORD your God has chosen you out of all the peoples on the face of the earth to be his people, his treasured possession.”   Deuteronomy 7:6

“But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.”  1 Peter 2:9

And so we took our annual trip up to the Zielke cabins in northern Wisconsin.

Both boys tubed, and really loved the water.  They have been asking for days to go back to Corny.  The night we left Trevor said, “I want to live in Corny forever with Grandpa!” and prayed that night that we wouldn’t have to leave and God would make us forget in the morning that we were supposed to leave.  :)

Michael really did everything on this vacation.  He swam with the boys, got up with the boys, put the boys to bed, bathed the boys, everything.  He really is the greatest dad I could have for my children!

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how much you mean to me (us)!”

That was my little song lyric there.  Probably would have fit into one of our Purple Daizy songs, the band Stacy and I co-founded as tweens.

Just a refresher, Stacy’s mom, Cindy, and my mom were college roommates. Stacy and I have been close friends since birth.  Though we don’t see each other often, we always pick up right where we left off.

Oh, and now my children love her, too.  :)

June 4, 2004

Six years later…

Happy Anniversary to my love, Michael!  You are my helpmate, my best friend, my love, and the only person I’d want to go through life with!   Thank you for loving me and for always making me laugh!  Here’s to many more years together!

My mom recently told me she knows several of her friends that follow this blog…I’d love to hear from you!  I always respond to each and every one of my comments on here via email.   I love to know that people follow my thoughts, updates, and ramblings, and that they pray for me amidst it all!  So thank you for reading, I appreciate you!

Love,

Jen

We absoulutely love our good friends, Jay and Michelle.  Jay, Michelle, and Michael went to college together, and I tagged along to the friendship shortly there after and I couldn’t be more grateful.  Jay and Michelle have taught me so much on what it is to truly trust God despite painful life circumstances.  They have shown me what is to cling to God when all else fails and have Hope in Him alone .  I am so blessed by their amazing journey of faith (http://thejenisons.com/2009/07/22/chance-job-jenison/ ) and they inspire me in countless ways.   Jay and Michelle, I love you, Chance, and Bonn more than words can express.

We were filled with JOY last night to meet sweet little Bonn.   I’m not kidding, I’ve never met such a peaceful little guy!  I love him to pieces already!  And I’m so excited for all our boys to play together!

Congratulations Jay and Michelle!!!!!    WE LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If I have a third boy, I could be this….and that is a tad bit intriguing. :)

All three of my children in one picture…hard to believe, right?   I don’t think it still has really hit me.

Although, seeing my third child up on the video screen during my ultrasound this morning, and hearing my husband tell our boys that little white fuzz they were looking at was their sibling, made it sink in a little bit more.

I guess I never really feel “with child” in the beginning.   It just feels like I have the 24 hour flu all 7 days of the week.   I mean seriously, you aren’t showing, you just look fat.   You just want to sleep all the time.   And, if you’re like me you might need to carry a bucket with you as you chase your energetic little boys around.

I have made some observations though, and I’m using them to help me stay positive and keep looking towards the light at the end of the tunnel!

1.  Being early pregnant at the end of the spring is much better than in the middle of winter. With the boys, I suffered through the sickness in the dead of winter, when you already feel gloomy and depressed.  This time, getting out in the sun and fresh air definitely helps!   Plus my mindset is so much better- how can you not feel good when school is letting out and all the summer festivities are about to begin?

2.  It pays to have a great husband. Michael has done dishes, vacuumed, played and wrestled with stir-crazy boys, and let me sleep in.   He is wonderful.   When he gets home from work no questions are asked as I meander up to my bed to watch TV on DVD (or TV online) while he takes over duty the rest of the evening.    He just knows the protocol of a sick, pregnant wife and doesn’t confusingly ask, “Did you seriously just watch all 10 seasons of FRIENDS this week???”

3.  No matter if its your 1st child or your 3rd child, nothing is as amazing as seeing and hearing your baby’s heartbeat. God never ceases to amaze me.   It truly is the miracle of life.   There is a fabulous creation inside of my body made by the hands of the Great Creator Himself.   I am forever grateful for this incredible blessing and I’m filled with joy to be this little person’s mom.  -What “morning” sickness??? :)

…would bring her 13×9 Pyrex with brownies, a lighter, and candles to the zoo to sing Happy Birthday.

I love these sweet voices.  :)

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